Evans blames self for Chester horrorshow

Evans blames self for Chester horrorshow

Evans loaned to Chester

BUSA boss Allitt installs himself as manager with ‘97% backing’

Blaming himself for Wednesday night’s shambolic display against Chester City, Steve Evans has shipped himself out on loan to Chester City on an emergency short term deal, impsTALK can exclusively reveal in today’s exclusive Friday slow news day update.

To cover for Evans, Paul Raynor acted quickly to install himself as boss. Not quite as quickly as United board member Dale Allitt however, who jumped into the hot seat within seconds, producing 2000 letters approving his surprise self-appointment as manager.

“97% of Boston United Supporters Association (BUSA) members back my appointment,” the BUSA chairman told impsTALK while waving a wad of signed letters doctored with black marker pen.

Prior to the transfer of Steve Evans to Chester, players had reported witnessing the controversial Scotsman arguing with himself, giving himself the cold shoulder, ignoring himself during five-a-side training and telling himself he was not even half the man Daryl Clare is.

Towering targetman Julian Joachim told impsTALK: “He was acting increasingly erratically. He called himself in for extra training late last night, then dropped himself to the subs bench, then rang up Chester and said he was available on a loan deal. The transfer window doesn’t apply to managers, apparently.”

Evans then departed York Street, allegedly kicking himself out the door while shouting: “I sully the good name of Boston United… I won’t tolerate a cumulative mountain of individual errors!”

Chester confirmed they told Evans they weren’t interested in him, but the deal was wrapped up with the Football League within ten minutes, much to Mark Wright’s fury. Evans has been knocking on the door of the locked Deva Stadium since 11.00am this morning.

“That’s a situation Steve’s used to,” sinister Lavaflow chairman Jon Sotnick told reporters at a midday press conference. “Has he tried the doorbell? Tell him to try the doorbell. We need a new ground.”

The stupidly-named Boston United fanzine.
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