‘Ice’ phenomenon takes town by surprise

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‘Ice’ phenomenon takes town by surprise

Boston United staff and supporters reacted with ‘shock and awe’, as did most of England, after waking up to what experts call frost this morning.

News of the strange white substance quickly made it to major news corporations and was reported in most daily newspapers.

Boston United were forced to postpone a crucial Bob’s Kebabs Northern Trophy fixture and admitted that they were totally unprepared for what they discovered on the York Street pitch yesterday.

“How can you foresee something like this?” said John Blackwell, Boston’s General Manager. “With Britain’s warm, sunny climate you just don’t expect any kind of cold conditions to come about, especially not ice, of all things.”

The effects of the frost were not restricted to Boston. In Nottingham, Central Trains were forced to cancel many services and Nottingham City Council declared a state of emergency.

“It’s a similar situation in Boston,” councillor John Cullins told impsTALK. “The only obvious solution to this natural disaster of immense magnitude is to increase Council Tax proportionally.”

The stupidly-named Boston United fanzine.
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