Sotnick: No Evans-HM Revenue rift
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Gaffer and Government still ‘best buddies’ claims sinister frontman

Boston United gaffer and all-round good egg Steve Evans has denied falling out with ‘good friend’ Bob Gufftrucker at HM Customs and Revenue over alleged gambling debts in excess of £1.5 million.

A two line story in the Lincolnshire Echo had suggested that Evans and Boston United had amassed huge debts gambling on promotion to League One and could not afford to pay them back, leading to the fall-out.

But Evans denied reports of a rift. “Bob and I remain very close friends,” he said today while donning a wig and mascara to avoid capture. “We are the best of pals. We have a great relationship based on mutual respect, despite me having the smallest budget in League Two.”

Mr Gufftrucker, a 300-pound bruiser with a track record of breaking legs with crowbars and nailing tax-dodging scum all over South Lincolnshire, told impsTALK: “Oh yeah, we’re best buddies all right. I’m close to Mr Evans. I’m that close to nailing his friggin’ ass, and about fucking time too.”

Sinister Lavaflow CEO Jon Sotnick is reportedly furious that Evans had been introduced to the HM Revenue officers and had fallen-in with the tax-paying masses. He also denied that massive debts are a problem in football.

“Bloody nonsense,” the angry chairman stormed. “So what if Boston have a few debts? It’s normal. And poor old Steve is easily led, he just needs looking after. My little Scottish cherub needs a hug every now and then. We all do sometimes. We also need a new ground.”