Dr Ken Fox is a clever man. He’s also our landlord, which is why we’re contractually obligated to remind the world just how clever he is every two weeks. Here are Ken’s Ten Questions, in which he looks back fondly at the disaster that was the 2008/2009 season….
Yo, yo, yo Ken. Let’s kick off by patronising one of the two-bob poxy village outfits we’ve visited this season by asking you where our Brave Lads battled against the slope with the most severe gradient this season?
Kendal Town for the mud bath and Prescot Cables for hiding the ball in the long grass.
Where did 2008/2009 rank on your Worst Ever Season list?
It’s in about third place behind 2006/7 when the cheating, fat, lying, Scottish, Devil incarnate came within a whisker of destroying the club and 1992/3 when Boston actually got relegated for being no good at playing football.
Alas, there was no trip to Tebay Services this year, so what was your favourite stop-off for preposterously expensive grub?
This is a toss-up between the Buffet Bar at Stalybridge Railway Station on the way to Ashton and the Brewer’s Pride on the outskirts of Ocid. Both had a superb range of real ales. The Brewer’s Pride just edges it as it also did some half-decent pub grub and had a conveniently timed bus service to deliver me straight to Ocid’s Ingfield ground in time for kick-off.
Who was Boston United’s third best player this season?
Surprisingly it must be ImpsTALK’s sponsored player Liam Parker who following the sponsorship overcame overwhelming odds and put in a fair number of excellent performances and scored a few goals into the bargain.
Pilgrims fans returned from Kendal convinced Boston United were going down. Many started eying up clubs in the division below, and reacted with horror at the thought of Boston lining up on equal terms with some hamlet like Grantham. Which lower-NPL side was it that filled you with the most dread?
Playing against a vegetable (Leek) and a meat-substitute (Quorn) may be OK for vegetarians, but I prefer teams with proper names.
Apart from Boston itself, in which town did fear for your physical safety the most?
I was quite worried about going to FCUM but unlike their namesakes they turned out to have the friendliest, most welcoming fans in the division. Fortunately I never made it to Ilkeston, so it’s probably Prescot.
Let’s get controversial. Should Steve Welsh be trusted to lead the Pilgrims into 2009/2010?
Absolutely – I can see him breaking Freddy Tunstall’s record as Boston’s longest serving manager. What’s that you say? He’s gone? Never! (alright, alright… drop the sarcasm Ken, we can’t legislate for massive breaking news exclusives – impsTALK ed)
If you had a choice between staying in the Northern Premier League or moving south, would you stay put? Although just to be clear, you’re not important enough to make this kind of decision
We have to stay put – southern clubs are a bugger to get to from Leeds and they don’t know anything about real ale down south. The club wouldn’t get any photos from away games either as I wouldn’t be there to take them! Seriously though the club doesn’t need a fourth consecutive season in a new division.
Who will be next season’s Adam Millson?
Swine flu: end of the world, or embarrassing hysteria for which Sky News and Twitter are largely culpable?
End of the world, oink.